I’m not sure what your experience is, but I find my confidence is fickle. Sometimes I feel strong and full of faith and then the next day I feel like quitting. My soul can feel tossed to and fro. I need to remind myself to not let my emotions change the truth about God, but let the truth of God change my emotions.
Personally, music and worship have played a significant role in my life by strengthening and encouraging my mind and soul on many occasions. My latest song is no exception! I wrote ‘Jesus has Conquered’ to help point myself, and I hope others, to Jesus. It started out just as a verse and a chorus that I shared with our church one Sunday morning. I felt it was for someone that day. A few people told me that it spoke to them and so I kept writing.
I have found that sometimes I judge myself for my mistakes and sins even though I know the Lord has forgiven me. I felt that the Lord impressed on me that for me to continue to judge myself when I am forgiven is equivalent to me setting myself up as a higher judge than the Lord himself. The reality is that the Lord’s judgment of my freedom in Christ is absolute and final!
Jesus is better than anything we have, chase or desire. He is the reason we have hope, encouragement, and ultimately confidence. Our confidence is not drawn from within ourselves but as we look to Jesus. Hebrews says “we have confidence to enter the holy places by the blood of Jesus” (10:19). It so important to emphasize that the key is not our confidence, but the blood of Jesus. It’s his victory that gives me confidence, not my personal state of mind. The basis for confidence is secure, objective, and unchanging.
While I know this to be true, I continually have to preach to my soul this truth. Undoubtedly, there are times when I still find myself feeling discouraged or I don’t see what God is doing. It’s in these times that I must look to Jesus. Even though “my flesh and my heart may fail…God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever” (Psalm 73:26).
The irony of ‘Jesus has Conquered’ is that I found, during the process of writing, producing, and releasing the song, that I had so much doubt and insecurity. Everything from if I should even be writing and sharing music in such a saturated space, to insecurities about how my voice sounds, or uncertainty about how finances for the project would work, as well as if there is any long-term viability to continue sharing music this way. The Holy Spirit prompted my heart many times by just pointing me to words of my own song…”Jesus conquered, so I won’t throw my confidence away”.
I’m grateful that Jesus promised us the Holy Spirit “will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you” (John 14:26). As I’ve pondered this verse, I’m amazed that the King of Heaven doesn’t leave us alone to stumble and fight on our own, but fills us with his very presence. He is both totally holy and separate from us, but completely intimate and present with us at the same time. God is with us! God is with me! This is an amazing mystery.
My prayer is that ‘Jesus has Conquered (Confidence)’ will be a song that will help remind us of the truth about who God is, what he’s done, and why he’s worthy, and through this bring true confidence.
— Phil Craig